I drink from the keg of glory, Donna. Bring me the finest muffins and bagels in all the land.
Thank you for the comments, those who decided to placate me. You've earned yourself another full page of wonder. Congratulations on knowing me, by the way.
Stephen's post reminded me what I am about to discuss, so I commented on his blog. Then I thought I'd cheat a little and just transfer the comment over to my own blog as a post. Huzza for laziness!
I have a painful pain that suddenly pains me out of nowhere. I have a shoulder injury from high school that comes from a bad slide tackle in a soccer game that flipped me upside down and then later in the year, a vicious suplex in a wrestling match. Both of these hurt. Super bad.
But neither of them hurt nearly as bad as it does when, completely randomly and of its own accord, my shoulder gives this loud popping noise and tries to kill me. I don't know what I ever did to make my shoulder angry, but it seems to hate me with all the fire of a thousand hells.
This is not a chronic pain. It's just this thing that happens ever so randomly and seldomly, less than every six months. You would think this would be a relief, but in fact it just makes it all the worse. If it were a chronic continuous pain, I would have either gone to the doctor or died by now. In either case the problem would be solved. But as it is now, there is always this fear in the back of my mind that my shoulder could strike at any moment. How would you like knowing that you have a sworn enemy with only your misery at heart stalking you your every waking moment?
I might be standing somewhere like the mall and raise my arm above my head to give someone a wave hello and the next minute you'd think I'd been shot because I am on the ground howling in pain. This is an all-consuming, life-ending type of pain that sends shockwaves throughout my body from my eyelids to my pinky toes. I mean it actually makes me cry. I am not exagerrating for humor. This is the worse pain I've anyone has ever felt except for Jesus.
Then in about forty-five seconds it stops hurting. This is, I admit, odd. Nevertheless, during those forty-five seconds, if someone offered to end my life, I think I might accept with gratitude.
Just thought I'd share.
posted by Bosephus Jamiroquai @ 10:30 AM
9 Comments:
You have random people read and comment on your blog? Sigh. You win this battle...
... but the WAR. The war is far from over.
Lest the excoriating pleas for comments never cease, let it be known that I actually read this drivel on a daily basis. To level the playing field, you must now comment on my blog, Mr. Bocephus Jamiroquai!
maynardkeynes.blogspot.com
Damn your shoulder! (Did that help? No? Want a massage?)well at least you have something specific to blame your pain on, whereas I am pained for no reason at all. Woe is me. The drama continues... ;)
ps. I love your blog and I read it religiously
Hey David the Random Guy, it's Cheryl the Random Gal. Anyway, thanks for your comments. Thought I'd check out your blog and leave you a comment since they're so nice to get. I will keep reading!
I also read your blog regularly and enjoy it. Now, I also demand that you read mine and enjoy it.
juleswinfield.blogspot.com
I have a similar pain...it's in my back and doesn't allow me to walk. Stupid spinal chord...
...yes I'm aware that it's spinal *cord*
now let everyone be aware of my horrible spelling skills
I have followed you over here - though I am not sure where "here" is - just the same, here I am.
Now go to the doctor and get that checked out.
Wow...this post just keeps getting better each day I've read it.
...
all nine of them
...
ZzzzzzzzZzzzzzz
;-)
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